Relationship Hangout With Bella: Guys, 5 Things to Look Out For Before Approaching a Lady

True, there are 5 things to Look Out For Before Approaching a Lady. Unfortunately, many guys today are what I’ll call, confused. This is because they are attracted to almost all types of ladies, who appeal to them. If they see Kate today, they will want to be her friend because of how beautiful she is. By tomorrow, it will be Evelyn, because of her nice shape.

“When I see a lady, the first thing I look at is her hair, then her clothes, because for me, her clothes tells me where she might have been. While her hair tells me where she is in life”. These are the words of Philip, a friend of mine. He told me this when I asked for the first things he notices in a lady, that gets him interested.

Let me tell you something: Your Relationship will Never Last if You keep Dating a lady because of her looks. Remember Beauty fades, but Character Lasts.

Have you seen this quote?

If you’re pretty, you’re pretty; but the only way to be beautiful is to be loving. Otherwise, it’s just “congratulations about your face”.

John Mayer


So guys out there, what are those things to look out for in a lady you want to take seriously?


“It’s the first thing I notice. There’s nothing more attractive than a Personality that match with your own”. Obinna, said.

You see, one of the most important things in a relationship is not about how great both of you are, but how great you are to each other. Guys need to see the real person they are dating or courting. They should see the lady’s dreams, hopes, fears, etc.

You cannot close eyes to this, because this is essential, if your must have a strong lasting relationship, then you must be sure, the lady that catches your fancy has a personality you can live comfortably with.

Behind every great guy, there’s a woman, with personality. A woman willing to assist, willing to make peace in the home rather than start world war 3.


“The first time I met my wife, the first thing I notice about her was her ability to start a conversation with people who were shy around their environment. She first introduce herself and then helped bring them into a conversation. I was surprise by how she treated others that were not her family. When I saw that, wow, I promised myself I’ll marry a girl like that’ And I did. I married her!” Segun said.

Segun story is one out of many, and a great example too. I see guys dating girls who find it hard to mingle with their family, and yet, these guys are so bent on marrying these girls.

These same girls will go on to cause rift between you and your friends, as well as your siblings and even the parents. Then the guy will cry, saying it is the devil’s work.

Jeez! But you saw it, right before you married her, that she was the type who couldn’t relate with your family and even your friends.

The type of beauty that never fades from a woman is Good Character. And how a woman treats others determines how good her character is.


“The eye sees only what the mind is prepared to comprehend”- Henry Bergson.

I know to keep an open mind is one of the most difficult things to practice. But most guys like their girlfriends to be open with them, no matter how heavy the issue at hand is.

Guys, if a lady can’t be open-minded with you or your plans, just as you’re open with her, please run.

Just a few days back, I read about a lady who ended her relationship because the guy is catholic. Haba! But the guy didn’t complain about her being pentecostal.

If you can accept her as she is, or with whatever decisions she has made, why can’t she do same for you?

Guys, if she is open-minded with you, keep her, because this will make life easier and peaceful for you in your relationship.


“I love a lady that can make me and my family or my friends laugh. It brightens up my day to know that when I have a rough day at work my woman is there to brighten me up”. Emma said.

A lot of guys today want a lady that can make them laugh and forget what made them angry in the first place. Guys love a lady that has this sense of Humor in them. It gives them the confidence that their girlfriend will always make their day beautiful

But hey? Not all of us are comedians. We cannot crack your ribs like Basket Mouth and his friends will do. All the same, guys, go for a lady who can cheer you up.

I remember one time I visited my friend. Her husband had just returned from work with a huge frown. She greeted him. I did too. He answered quickly and disappeared into the passage, obviously heading for their room.

My friend excused herself and went in to be with her husband. Thirty minutes later, she emerged, laughing. Her husband was right behind her laughing. And our conversation from then on was smooth.

I can’t tell what happened. But this lady is one who noticed her husband’s bad mood and did something about it. Guys, if you have a lady like this, keep her.


Guys already hate girl who are too clingy. Ewww… yeah they do. Especially if it is financial.

But again, there are those guys who want to show off. They feel, if she know say I ho money, she fo give me face. Yes o. She will.

The gas man, yeah, we call him gas man, who sells gas at my junction, spent his entire savings to keep a girl who the neighborhood guys tagged, “hot”.

Few months into their relationship, they break up. Why? Miss. Hot has found a richer guy to sap dry.

Guys, if she isn’t working and earning her own money, because she’s lazy, don’t go there. Unless she is really trying to get a job or start a business.

Also, if she’s working and earning her own money, but still wants you to buy her body cream, sanitary pad, food stuff, clothes etc. I’m telling you now, ruuuuuunnnnnn! Don’t even look back, seriously.

If you later marry such a girl, she’ll never see any reason why she should support you financially in running the home. You alone will shoulder all the financial responsibilities and mehn, that’s as good as digging your grave early.

A guy once told me that his wife, before they married, studied Business Administration at the University. For years. And after she was through, she had no job, despite submitting so many applications.

Tired of waiting, she decided to learn tailoring for 1 year. After her training, she open up a shop and within a year, she had 8 apprentices working under her and making cool cash. Her certificate is somewhat buried. But she is independent and supports her husband in running the home.

Remember, being with a lady who tickles your fancy doesn’t have to be the end of the world for you. Choose wisely.

Are there other points you’ll like to add, please drop them in the comment box below. I look forward to reading from you.

About the Author

Relationship Hangout

Ifeoma Isabella Okeke is a passionate creative writer and a contributor on Pelleura. Her work, titled, ‘My Legendary-Achebe’ earned her an award in the 2016 essay writing competition. When she isn’t working or glued to her books, she spends time thinking up new ideas. Her two novels, Moonlight and the Warrior and The Return of Ijele are available on Okadabooks. She is currently working on her third. Her life is indeed, her message.

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