The main bus top at my location serves as a mini market. Items sold by some of the traders are at or almost at same price as the main market.
The bus stop is usually my shopping joint as I even get some food items cheaper than at the main market.
So yesterday afternoon, I went shopping, especially for soup items.
I was almost done when fight broke out at the house opposite the shop I patronize. I looked up to see two children, a boy and girl, digging it.
The boy is a little taller than the girl. Let’s say about 7 or 8 years old. While the girl, small in stature, could be about 5 years old.
However, the girl’s voice was the loudest. Their mother quickly left her tailoring shop, just in front of their house, to separate the duo. She then pulled the boy back into the shop.
But his sister was not willing to let whatever the issue was, to rest. She went after him, screaming and insulting. Her mother tried to put an end to the quarrel.
I ignored the issue, thinking silently, they were just kids.
A woman happened to also be with me in the shop when the incident happened. We all watched quietly. But as soon as we all turned eyes away from the drama, the woman spoke: “This kain one, Na so so beat her husband go dey beat am for house”.
I looked up at the woman, studying her face all over. Yup, my far senior. So I really didn’t know how to replying her without coming across as offensive.
I remember when I was little. I never spared my brothers. Lol. Why? I am the only female child in the family and the boys were oppressing me badly.
They hardly allowed me join them in certain games, saying I’m a girl. They never let me in on secrets, saying girls can’t keep secrets. Lol.
Back then, I was always fighting for my right with whatever insults I learnt from school and my mom never spared her cane.
Sharp mouth. Rude. Arrogant. Abusive etc.
And my brothers never failed to tell me words like, “shey that’s how you will do when you get married?”
It was when we were a bit older they started to pull me in, after I proved myself worthy of being a gang member.
Fast forward to my adult years. And they see a different Karo. They’re now the ones saying , “man we go marry you is extra lucky o”.
So when this woman made that statement, I felt the girl’s pain. Yup, everyone will say one annoying thing or another to her.
Funny enough, we didn’t even know the cause of the fight. We only heard the screaming.
Deciding to respect myself, I closed my ears to anything else the woman was saying and carried my shopping bag.
As I walked away, I looked in the girl’s direction one last time. She had stopped going after her brother. And seemed a little more relaxed.
I whispered: dear girl, I speak to counter whatever the others have said about you just now. You’re not stubborn, you’re not bad, your husband will not beat you, you will respect people, and you will grow up to be beautiful and respected.
Dear elders, please learn to speak positively into the lives of children. It doesn’t matter if they’re yours or not.
Train the children around you, boy and girl, as they grow, to be the best. Don’t be thinking marriage. That’s not the most important thing at that age. Thank you.
Have you had this kind of experience? Please share with us in the comment section.